My MUM

[Maggie]

Over the last year, I've been looking after my Mum, because I live nearest to her. My brother and sister are about two hours away.
She's very old, very frail and can't remember anything. She's like a child, but she's still my mum, and I adore her. Time is very short now, and I wrote this yesterday while I was waiting for the doctor to arrive.


Mum



So beautiful she trod her youth

So much alive, and filled with truth

A woman worth a lifetime’s glance

A picture moving through The Dance



We ran within her love’s embrace

She kept out harm with endless grace

We didn’t think, too young to see

How absolute her love could be.



Life’s journey took us far and wide

But brought us back, a place to hide

When life had dealt an unfair blow

The Mum we knew would not say no.



We loved her true, but spared no thought

On endless love that can’t be bought

We trampled through the timeless years

With selfish lives we had no fears



However did we reach this scene?

We played our lives, how safe it seemed

For every year life let us run

It took a little from my Mum



I watch her gazing through the glass

At life and people running past

All hope of joining now has gone

A frail spectator looking on



No memory of seconds left

No chance to dance at life’s behest

No strength is left, her life on hold

Where lives my Mum so strong and bold



We should have known, we should have seen

That while we ran, her life had been.

Worn out, no more a work of art

I’ll keep her cradled in my heart



Now fear at facing what must be

Has stopped me running, made me see

With eyes no longer looking past

I know the dancing cannot last



M Peacock

[P_chan]

Very sweet maggie. See, you gotta take care of your kids once you're a parent. That way you have someone to change your depends for you once you get old:D

[Bones]

As posted by P_chan:

Very sweet maggie. See, you gotta take care of your kids once you're a parent. That way you have someone to change your depends for you once you get old:D

Yeah, nice poem. Why does it it have to take a long time before you say something like this to your parents?

And, P_chan, about the "depends"?

Always carry some with you when you're deployed. Why?

Playing a war scenario during an exercise is one thing, but when you get to experience the real thing, that's something else. You'll thank me for it later.

Bones

[Maggie]

As posted by P_chan:



Yeah, nice poem. Why does it it have to take a long time before you say something like this to your parents?

And, P_chan, about the "depends"?

Always carry some with you when you're deployed. Why?

Playing a war scenario during an exercise is one thing, but when you get to experience the real thing, that's something else. You'll thank me for it later.

Bones

My Dad died suddenly, and I had so much I wanted to say to him.

I've always been close to mum, and I'm the youngest She's always known how I feel about her.

I tell her every day now, but she forgets within minutes.

If I thought that any kids I had wouldn't turn out like me, I might have had a couple :thumbdown:

Maggie

[Maggie]

Very sweet maggie. See, you gotta take care of your kids once you're a parent. That way you have someone to change your depends for you once you get old:D

If only :D

Maggie

[applejacks]

What a very sweet poem and what a great daughter you are for taking care of her.

[Maggie]

What a very sweet poem and what a great daughter you are for taking care of her.

Thank you.

She took care of me, now it's my turn. I promised her she would never be put in a home, and I intend to stick to that like glue.

Maggie :)

[Oxmix]

If I thought that any kids I had wouldn't turn out like me, I might have had a couple :thumbdown:Maggie

Why so hard on yourself?

Regards

Ox

[Maggie]

Why so hard on yourself?

Regards

Ox

I don't think I'm being hard on myself. I was a really difficult child. Borderline autistic, and I lead my parents a life of hell. If I'd been them, I'd have smothered me. I was a right bitch.
I have to make up for that, and I get to see my mum every day :) Not that she knows, but I do.

Maggie

[Odie]

Very touching Maggie, thank you for sharing! :)

[TheNoNamedOne]

My Dad died suddenly, and I had so much I wanted to say to him.

I've always been close to mum, and I'm the youngest She's always known how I feel about her.

I tell her every day now, but she forgets within minutes.

Maggs, so sorry to hear this.

What a wonderful poem you wrote. Very moving. I am glad to have read it.

[Maggie]

Maggs, so sorry to hear this.

What a wonderful poem you wrote. Very moving. I am glad to have read it.

Apparently it sucks. I posted it on a writers forun, and got this back.

<Nice sentiments, in rhyme and reasonable meter. However, I had difficulty getting past the second verse, due to the forced rhyme. By that I mean this in line 3: "A woman worth a lifetime glance". A glance is momentary; thus a "lifetime glance" is an impossibility, and obviously "glance was chosen to rhyme with "dance", without thought as to what was actually being said. The dual use of "So", an overused modifier, to open both lines 1 and 2 was off-putting.

That brought me to the second stanza "loves" should have been "love's" (per the context). At that point I had to force myself to go on.>

Maggie
PS I didn't know I had a stanza. Feck knows where I'll park it. :ohmy:

[Odie]

Apparently it sucks. I posted it on a writers forun, and got this back.

<Nice sentiments, in rhyme and reasonable meter. However, I had difficulty getting past the second verse, due to the forced rhyme. By that I mean this in line 3: "A woman worth a lifetime glance". A glance is momentary; thus a "lifetime glance" is an impossibility, and obviously "glance was chosen to rhyme with "dance", without thought as to what was actually being said. The dual use of "So", an overused modifier, to open both lines 1 and 2 was off-putting.

That brought me to the second stanza "loves" should have been "love's" (per the context). At that point I had to force myself to go on.>

Maggie
PS I didn't know I had a stanza. Feck knows where I'll park it. :ohmy:

Some literature mayor really takes themselves too seriously. Poetry has a greater value than just it's rhyme and metrical pattern. Someone could write a poem about dust settling with perfect form and it would suck, content is just if not MORE important. For what it's worth, I was moved by your poem Maggie.

P.s Tell that person to bend over so you can park your stanza. ;)

[Maggie]

Some literature mayor really takes themselves too seriously. Poetry has a greater value than just it's rhyme and metrical pattern. Someone could write a poem about dust settling with perfect form and it would suck, content is just if not MORE important. For what it's worth, I was moved by your poem Maggie.

P.s Tell that person to bend over so you can park your stanza. ;)

I did :D they no longer want me as a member. My criticism of their criticism wasn't well received :)

Maggie

[Sex Wax]

Maggie..thats cool. I wish I even knew enough about my mom to write a sentence. I hope you feel better and "press" on. you are cool. Sex Wax decrees it.

[Maggie]

Maggie..thats cool. I wish I even knew enough about my mom to write a sentence. I hope you feel better and "press" on. you are cool. Sex Wax decrees it.

Thank you. I'm pressing away. I watched my sister today trying to help my mum. She's doing her best, but she treats her like a child. Just because my mum can't articulate, and forgets stuff doesn't make her a retard. I know there's a lot she understands. I put another poem on, from mum's view.

Maggie