When Do You Throw A Drunk Out?

[hankypanky]

Do ya throw a guy out who goes to sleep at the bar, throws up, bothers other customers, gets in a fight? But what if this guy is one of your top spenders, let's say 10% of sales. A larger club with lots of customers, i would say yeah, toss him. But a smaller joint? What do ya think.

[kombu_kid]

Good Lord!! 10% of sales? Which one of the above did he do?.....or all of them!! I'd be hangin' on to that muthuh for dear life! But seriously, I'd probably give him a few more breaks than usual, (unless he's being really obnoxious to the other patrons) then draw the line and bounce him. Sleeping on the bar, not tooooo bad. Everything else sounds just like a pain in the a$$, and can't be tolerated long term.....

[bad_karma]

Give him the shoe...10% or not, he probably costs you more than that driving away other business with his obnoxious ways.

Peace,

BK out

[Asshat]

BK has it Hank... Does he repell customers? I'm okay with someone passing out, puking, whatever as long as they leave me alone. Everything else is good to go.

[DougP]

Depends on the kind of joint and where, this customer is sitting, sleeping etc. I've seen plenty of establishments around here who will let a guy sleep slightly out of sight from everyone else. To me I think if a patron bothers other customers or gets in a fight would be a definite yes on kicking them out. I can't stand the unintelligible dribbling chest thumping annoying people who think they have something to prove. I'd rather have a guy sleeping at the bar near where I'm sitting then have to deal with a real asshole, the kind I sometimes run into out on gate two.:)

[P_chan]

DougP pretty much summed it up. If he is driving away other customers, I would throw him out.

[Asshat]

I'd rather have a guy sleeping at the bar near where I'm sitting then have to deal with a real asshole, the kind I sometimes run into out on gate two.:)

And if we are lucky, he'll be another dude who looks like a chick!

[TheLastDon]

Throw him out maybe he will figure it out.

I have been thrown out plenty of times.:ohmy:

Usually for making a pass at guy who looks like a girl. :cool:

[dk]

I've woken up outside of plenty of bars, but I would prefer if I had more people to drink with so that I could be told, "dk, you've probably had enough" the minute I start nodding off rather than after.

If he's sleeping, as long as he's not taking up too much bar space, I'd say leave him alone. If he's off in a corner, leave him there till closing. And if he's being drunk and rowdy, tell him his wife called and she is PISSED.

But I know it's damn near impossible to move me after I pass out, so it's best to politely recommend that they leave as soon as you notice them nodding off.

In fact, if you see me nodding off in your place, please ask me to leave. It's better that I make it home sleepy at 3am than awake at 9am with the wife pissed at me.

[Go-Shay]

Hank you can start a wall of shame. When I had a bar in Kin we used to take pics of people that passed out or puked and post them on the wall behind the bar.

[DougP]

I've woken up outside of plenty of bars, but I would prefer if I had more people to drink with so that I could be told, "dk, you've probably had enough" the minute I start nodding off rather than after.

If he's sleeping, as long as he's not taking up too much bar space, I'd say leave him alone. If he's off in a corner, leave him there till closing. And if he's being drunk and rowdy, tell him his wife called and she is PISSED.

But I know it's damn near impossible to move me after I pass out, so it's best to politely recommend that they leave as soon as you notice them nodding off.

In fact, if you see me nodding off in your place, please ask me to leave. It's better that I make it home sleepy at 3am than awake at 9am with the wife pissed at me.

You know I got your back:thumbup:

[dk]

Yeah, I appreciated it Doug. I really did. :D

It's nice to know people who'll help me out when it happens, and I'm pretty sure nobody is perfect... :o

I have money, so this weekend I'm really going to try to go out if you're still interested. :) I already gave my wife advance notice!

[DougP]

Well as always I'm up for anything.. As long as it isn't during the K-1 match Saturday evening:D

[dk]

Well as always I'm up for anything.. As long as it isn't during the K-1 match Saturday evening:D
What time does the K-1 match end?

[DougP]

Shouldn't be too late because its being showed real time on Sky Pa starts 5:00PM. Its going to be explosive!!!

http://www.k-1.co.jp/k-1gp/btop.htm

Sorry to go off topic:D

[hankypanky]

This is all hypothentical guys/gals. Ok, let's put a twist to it. the fights are not physical, just argumentive. The ones he argues with would never spend the same amount of money, nor are they regulars. And they can be a pain in the ass also.

The sleeping part i've already made a decision on awhile back. It they are with a friend or two at the counter and they are spending money, put him on a sofa until his friends are ready to leave. If he is alone, as soon as he starts nodding off, ( it's hard to keep drinking when your sleeping) send him on his way.

DK hit it on the head, once their asleep, it's harder than hell to wake them.. A few even get physical when you try to wake them. Maybe they were just starting a battle of wake when you woke them.

:)

[DougP]

This is all hypothentical guys/gals. Ok, let's put a twist to it. the fights are not physical, just argumentive. The ones he argues with would never spend the same amount of money, nor are they regulars. And they can be a pain in the ass also.

Well if its a short pissing contest then no biggie. If it drags on and on and on and is getting on everyone else nerves then someone needs to step in. If they can't get along or stay separated them selves and want to act like 2 year olds then send them packing. At least for the night.:)

[hankypanky]

Well, that don't always work. I've sent them packing before and the never come back. Okinawans are like kids when they are in the bar. They get bruised or pissed and never come back. Bar business, if you need it is very stressing sometimes. My wife and I have basically changed our policy on customers. The customer is never right, and we pick the customers, not the customers pick us. So basically, if they behave, spend money, no problem. The spend money and misbehave, your outa here. If you behave and don't spend money, your out of here. Easy fix.

[dk]

My wife and I have basically changed our policy on customers. The customer is never right, and we pick the customers, not the customers pick us. So basically, if they behave, spend money, no problem. The spend money and misbehave, your outa here. If you behave and don't spend money, your out of here. Easy fix.
I like the way you and your wife think. :thumbup1:

[DougP]

Yeah that's pretty good policy in my mind.

[Tony Stacks]

Well, that don't always work. I've sent them packing before and the never come back. Okinawans are like kids when they are in the bar. They get bruised or pissed and never come back. Bar business, if you need it is very stressing sometimes. My wife and I have basically changed our policy on customers. The customer is never right, and we pick the customers, not the customers pick us. So basically, if they behave, spend money, no problem. The spend money and misbehave, your outa here. If you behave and don't spend money, your out of here. Easy fix.


Ik what u mean. U have to be that way cuz ppl break shit or just waste ur time.

I would think all that karaoke would bring in the ppl though.

[OCanadaOurHomeAndNativeLand]

If he starts pamphleting in the bar, throw his ass out!

[Tony Stacks]

If he starts pamphleting in the bar, throw his ass out!


What does that mean?

[OCanadaOurHomeAndNativeLand]

What does that mean?
Ask TP. He probably has more tracts than a Jehova's Witness.

[Tony Stacks]

Ask TP. He probably has more tracts than a Jehova's Witness.


LMFAO
:thumbup1:

[Isaak Brodsky]

When he barfs on the bar maid's breasts or vomits on the bar tender's torso. A sleeping drunk is fine so long as he keeps his beer down.

[hankypanky]

Ik what u mean. U have to be that way cuz ppl break shit or just waste ur time.

I would think all that karaoke would bring in the ppl though.

i think the average of people who sing karaoke, americans that is, is about 10%. Many american men think it's not kool to sing. Girls have no problem. Problem is, there are not alot of girls in the marine corps, which i am close to Marine bases. Kadena has all the women and there happy with that trash they have on gate street because they can walk.

[hankypanky]

When he barfs on the bar maid's breasts or vomits on the bar tender's torso. A sleeping drunk is fine so long as he keeps his beer down.


hell that happens 1 time a week. not the gold fish mind you. You have to have thick skin to work in a bar with your wife unless she is ugly as sin, which mine is not!

[ja_Patriot]

Rule no. 1: Customer is always right.

Rule no. 2: When good customer pukes, see rule no. 1.

Have hot towels ready. Next time he comes in, politely hand him one and tell him he might need it like he did the last time. In a very nice Japanese polite way; you're the expert.

Good luck.

[Crazysix]

Rule no. 1: Customer is always right.

Rule no. 2: When good customer pukes, see rule no. 1.

Have hot towels ready. Next time he comes in, politely hand him one and tell him he might need it like he did the last time. In a very nice Japanese polite way; you're the expert.

Good luck.
LOL Hot towel are you trying to encourage him to puke?????:barf::barf::w00t::w00t:

[ja_Patriot]

No, you're telling him politely not to soil himself.

If I were the owner, I'd play the numbers. The take is 10% of income. This type of business requires an allocation of at least 5% in G&A costs plus 7% marketing & sales.

Meaning to replace this customer, you need to spend at least about 10% of your income, or two customers spending the same amount of money as this customer to cover the cost to bring 2 new customers in.

You'd want to keep his business is the bottom line.

Sales to the puker is probably about 80-90% of gross operating profit.

Got it?

[hankypanky]

Rule no. 1: Customer is always right.

Rule no. 2: When good customer pukes, see rule no. 1.

Have hot towels ready. Next time he comes in, politely hand him one and tell him he might need it like he did the last time. In a very nice Japanese polite way; you're the expert.

Good luck.

I've been in this biz for 3 years now, rule #1 never applies, unless you want to just hand over the keys to the knuckleheads.

[ja_Patriot]

The "knucklehead" patronizes your bar. All us machos here end a good evening sometimes having a little too much, so we're knuckleheads?

The JU party is definitely starting to drift away from your joint as far as I'm concerned. I don't know if you can handle a dozen "knuckleheads".

3 years? What business were you in before?

[Isaak Brodsky]

Kinda got to thinkin' 'bout the question posted in the OP.

Isn't it really the principal goal of a drinking establishment to medicate patrons with as much spirits as possible so as to maximize profits and to maximize the pleasure of the patron??

Of course, you are not at all obligated to medicate anyone who walks through the door.

Maybe the drunk who becomes belligerent with your wife or with patrons should be cast onto the sidewalk. Vomit stains can be removed, but sometimes bruises, cuts or stab wounds sustained from assaults aren't as easily repaired. Often times, a belligerent drunk will only escalate problems for proprietors like you if you give them time, space and more fuel - like whisky or beer or both.

Maybe an angry foul-mouthed drunk ought to be invited to the exit.

[DougP]

Rule no. 1: Customer is always right.

Rule no. 2: When good customer pukes, see rule no. 1.

Have hot towels ready. Next time he comes in, politely hand him one and tell him he might need it like he did the last time. In a very nice Japanese polite way; you're the expert.

Good luck.

I don't think this would always work. Keep in mind where his joint is located and what kind of customers he might have as regulars. I'm sure Hank knows how to run his establishment just fine. The two rules you just posted do not apply to half of the bars frequented by a large group of young joes. Most of the joints out near bases like Kadena and Foster would not benefit to such guidelines. These are not like your run of the mill quiet Japanese Izakaya/ karaoke bars we're talking about here. More like bars that can be like the wild wild west at times and deserve a different approach. Not saying Hank's place is like that. Hell, never been so I wouldn't know. But I have seen plenty of bars around here that attract a certain type of patronage and are better off with bouncers and tasers than manners and hot towels.:thumbup1:

Once again I'm sure Hank knows what he needs to do in order to run his establishment.:)

[hankypanky]

Thanks dude! But when i say rule #1 does not apply, i'm talking about okinawan customers, not americans! This is a country of service(which means you pamper the hell out of them, or you don't pump your own gas). Give em an inch and they will take a mile. When you get a couple who comes in who has Y1,000,000 in their wallet and they are asking for a discount, makes me want to get the louisville slugger in action. These kinda people are ******* leaches. They go around a try to penny pinch everyone.

My wife and i went with these 2 to a show in naha and they had no reservation spending 500 dollars on a show and 2 bottles for the four of us. So i do know what i'm talking about.

Of course officers are the same way. Always looking for a discount. Yeah, that's what i'm gonna do. The next son of a bitch who ask me for a discount in my joint, I'm just gonna tell them to get the hell out. No more explaining. HAVE IT YOUR WAY MF!!

whooo, got that off my chest. Time for a drink!:thumbup:

[DougP]

Who asks for discounts at bars? Call me crazy but that just doesn't make any sense. Its sad to hear that people do that at your joint, Hank. I'm a penny pincher and a changer picker upper but I look for deals, I don't ask for them. If I was that worried about saving money I wouldn't be out spending it at the bar.

[dk]

I don't ask for discounts, but I do tend to ask for "a little extra" in my last glass of whisky just to hold me over until I get home. I've been known to ask for a "sabusu" shot of teqilla though. I'm usually pretty blitzed at that point though, so if you catch me doing that, feel free to say, "No dk, you're going to black out."

[hankypanky]

like i said, it is usually okinawans. Americans know, if your going out drinking, you need money.. seriously it happens every month. The only reason that i do not accept tabs in my joint is because some okinawan dude ran out so he wouldn't have to pay. LOL next time loser.

[ja_Patriot]

As posted by H&R in a related thread on his bar business:
If i would start over again, i would of opened a resturant vice a bar. Too many headaches when you add alchohol to the scene. At least everyone needs food, while only a few of us need alchohol.


You haven't been in business that long, you don't seem to enjoy it, and now you call a guy who gives you 10% of your sales a "knucklehead"?

This in a forum of potential customers. Screw you, comes to mind but what do we care. You're probably in the wrong business from all the rants you post here. And as a general rule, you may not like or agree with it but money talks and the customer is always king.

[dk]

So Ja, what sort of business background do you have? I'm genuinely interested. You don't have to flat out say which exact business it is you own, but I am interested in which field and how long it's been in business.

[DougP]

You haven't been in business that long, you don't seem to enjoy it, and now you call a guy who gives you 10% of your sales a "knucklehead"?

This in a forum of potential customers. Screw you, comes to mind but what do we care. You're probably in the wrong business from all the rants you post here. And as a general rule, you may not like or agree with it but money talks and the customer is always king.

Anyone can be a knucklehead regardless of their level of contribution. 10% .01% doesn't matter. That 10% can also drive away the other 90%. An establishment has to have some rules and customers should be expected to adhere to them.

I can also say that just about every club or decent sized bar I've been to in the states did not have a "customer is always right" attitude. It was quite the opposite and they wasted no time turning away potential patrons if their dress was unsuitable or if the appeared to be intoxicated on any level. I've been turned away from bars because my shirt was untucked and I didn't have a belt. I don't see how that is a customer = money mind set.

I think you might be stressing the word knucklehead to much. Its not that big of a deal and I don't think Hank has a bad attitude towards customers. From what I can tell so far. Dk, lets test that theory this weekend.:D

To add I've been that knucklehead before, however, when I was young. I don't mind others keeping me in check. Even if I'm throwing money left and right at the bar it gives me no right to be an ass.

[ja_Patriot]

Hospitality & restaurant; finance; international trade.

Look, I have all the respect for small business owners and appreciate all the obstacles, challenges and barriers to entry and success and establishing a going concern. All things being equal and given choices, I wouldn't want to be in a business which I don't enjoy 110%. Life's too short.

This thread is a lesson for me as well, in having some first hand experience shared by a business owner in Okinawa.

[Asshat]

I didn't get thrown out, even though I was fairly in the bag when I should up. Hank&Rumi are very congenial, straight talking and have some of the best bathrooms anywhere!

I did sing a song prior to Hank getting in- I think it was Red Hot Chili Peppers, but then I'm not sure.

And the nama was nice and fresh!

[dk]

They really do have a nice bathroom. :D

[socalheart]

That cinches it! I am so going to H&R for the bathroom! ;) heh.

[TheLastDon]

They really do have a nice bathroom. :D

Does it have one of those washlet thingies that wash and dry your butt?:w00t:

I will have to check his place out one of these days. They're just a little too south of my usual stomping grounds.

:thumbup1:

[Asshat]

Does it have one of those washlet thingies that wash and dry your butt?:w00t:

Yeah, but as you back into the urinal to get the flow right, your shirt gets pretty wet. :)

I didn't utilize the squatter. Had I stayed with whiskey, I would have kneeled over it....nah, the front door was too close.

[TheLastDon]

Yeah, but as you back into the urinal to get the flow right, your shirt gets pretty wet. :)

LOL


I didn't utilize the squatter. Had I stayed with whiskey, I would have kneeled over it....

That's why they come in handy; you can rinse out your mouth right there.:barf::rolleyes::D

[Asshat]

That's why they come in handy; you can rinse out your mouth right there.:barf::rolleyes::D

And get my ear wet? I guess one could rest their tounge against the back wall of the urinal and let the water sort of flow over it. It is a very nice urinal. A pleasure to pee in. Later on, I'm going to accidentaly check out the ladies'.

[hankypanky]

The "knucklehead" patronizes your bar. All us machos here end a good evening sometimes having a little too much, so we're knuckleheads?

The JU party is definitely starting to drift away from your joint as far as I'm concerned. I don't know if you can handle a dozen "knuckleheads".

3 years? What business were you in before?

i've been in the entertainment world for the last 10 years. prior to that i was with the Marine band, retired. So working with the public, booze is what i do.

as far as you being a "knucklehead", i'll make that decision after i see how you handle your alcohol. The great thing about being in japan, is i can say who can come into my joint. I can't be sued for not serving you. If i don't want your business, the door you go. Lovely style of business.

This is just a passing fad for me anyway. I don't plan on being 70 years old and tending bar. Just too many knuckleheads out there. I like to drink and have fun, but working a bar is hard business. Business is one thing, but mixing booze, business, ego.....they start a fire. I guess that's why there all knuckleheads.:barf:

[hankypanky]

And get my ear wet? I guess one could rest their tounge against the back wall of the urinal and let the water sort of flow over it. It is a very nice urinal. A pleasure to pee in. Later on, I'm going to accidentaly check out the ladies'.

That's why the floor was all wet. Had to bleach the hell out of it. Thought at first my dog pissed in there. All is well now, stench is gone. Thanks uminchu!!:thumbup:

[Asshat]

That's why the floor was all wet. Had to bleach the hell out of it. Thought at first my dog pissed in there. All is well now, stench is gone. Thanks uminchu!!:thumbup:

Well, the water certainly tasted good! Your dog is really cute too.

(now everyone thinks I pee on floors)

[socalheart]

LOL! We already thought that, uminchu.

Hank, do you know Harry from the Gate2Garage and Fujiyamas? He's kinda older and just hangs out at his bars to drink and spocialize. He also goes to other people's bars to drink and socialize. The closest thing to bartending I've ever seen him do is grab a friend a beer and hand the money to one of the girls. heh.

Now, I have to pee... and I should wash the dishes too... I guess.

[Asshat]

Hank, do you know Harry from the Gate2Garage and Fujiyamas?

The entire island knows Harry. :D

[ja_Patriot]

i've been in the entertainment world for the last 10 years. prior to that i was with the Marine band, retired. So working with the public, booze is what i do.

as far as you being a "knucklehead", i'll make that decision after i see how you handle your alcohol. The great thing about being in japan, is i can say who can come into my joint. I can't be sued for not serving you. If i don't want your business, the door you go. Lovely style of business.

This is just a passing fad for me anyway. I don't plan on being 70 years old and tending bar. Just too many knuckleheads out there. I like to drink and have fun, but working a bar is hard business. Business is one thing, but mixing booze, business, ego.....they start a fire. I guess that's why there all knuckleheads.:barf:


What the hell! A real "knucklehead" bar owner.

So here's to you! From one "knucklehead" to another. ;-)

[hankypanky]

LOL! We already thought that, uminchu.

Hank, do you know Harry from the Gate2Garage and Fujiyamas? He's kinda older and just hangs out at his bars to drink and spocialize. He also goes to other people's bars to drink and socialize. The closest thing to bartending I've ever seen him do is grab a friend a beer and hand the money to one of the girls. heh.

Now, I have to pee... and I should wash the dishes too... I guess.

i know of harry and his joints, looks like a fun dude. What he does is what i'd like to do, but he does have an ideal location and doesn't have to worry about getting people in the joint, doing a livehouse anyway. My place is a little off the beaten path, so most have to drive or take a taxi. Maybe in my next life!!

Plus harry has bouncers to throw out all the knuckleheads!!

[dk]

My place is a little off the beaten path, so most have to drive or take a taxi.
That's actually one of the things I like about your place.

[DougP]

I just have to ask.. whats that tune on your home page? :D

[Cathleen_38]

I tend to disagree with that, because if you want to spend some time chatting with your buddies without the hassle of buying something everytime you walk into the door you should be allowed to do so. I had that problem when I was in the Zodiac bar. I never went back I stay for a minute and left. They didn't get much of my business because of that reason and they played the same music everytime I went in, so really it was a waste of time going there. Not to respect the musicians because they were my friends also.
But to go in bar to get hit up for money turns me off. I'll go in there when "I" want a drink. Not to be forced into buying something because the bar owner wants me to. you feel me? it should be a freedom of choice.

[Cathleen_38]

As far as the drunkard in the bar scene, if he's not causing a raucous, leave him alone. if he's a happy drunk. leave him alone. and if it comes to where you have boot him out, tell him in a calm, polite manner that it's time to go.
tell you'll call him a cab to have him sent home and everything is cool and that's there's no problem. once you calm him down he'll understand you more rather than violent tactics. you'll draw more bees to honey than with vinegar if you get what I'm saying here. Yelling at a drunk doesn't help the situation it worsens it. be firm but diplomatic at the same time. and if he refuses to listen, call the cops. That will calm him down real quick.

[hankypanky]

I tend to disagree with that, because if you want to spend some time chatting with your buddies without the hassle of buying something everytime you walk into the door you should be allowed to do so. I had that problem when I was in the Zodiac bar. I never went back I stay for a minute and left. They didn't get much of my business because of that reason and they played the same music everytime I went in, so really it was a waste of time going there. Not to respect the musicians because they were my friends also.
But to go in bar to get hit up for money turns me off. I'll go in there when "I" want a drink. Not to be forced into buying something because the bar owner wants me to. you feel me? it should be a freedom of choice.

i choose to kickout freeloaders:D that's my choice. just kidding, but if you want to sit at the counter i'm going to push the hell out of you to buy drinks. if you want to jaw jack with your friends, by all means, i have plenty of tables in the rear.:)

[ja_Patriot]

Come to think of it, the bar tab here is probably what I'd pay for taxes and tips back home on a good time with friends at Satchmo's (Coral Gables).

Sobe (South Beach)? Minimum $200 /300 pp but ya gotta have real action.

[swindland]

I would throw out the guy (or gal) if he is being stupid and causing a fit with people in the bar or club.

[shuichi]

Hank, where is your bar? Looks sort of like the old "Club 21" down from futenma.

[shuichi]

I used to own a couple of places on Gate 2. Not all it's cut out to be.Anyway, one of the best things that I ever did was to put in a CCTV. if anyone became or I thought they were going to be a problem, I would just turn on the TV in the corner and look at it. No reason to say anything. Also I agree 100% about the customer being right. I saw more of people that I was rude to than I did the people I was nice to. Don't ask me why, but it seems as though the Marines especially like to be abused. Kick him out and tell him you'll let him back in when he's really ready to spend some $$$!

[EpicTrainwreck]

Aside from being a fairly prominent alcoholic in my community for a number of years, I've also worked in "alcohol serving establishments" for most of my adult life. In the bar business, as in life, you seem to have a lot of the same conversations over and over again. So here I submit some simple insights of the bar business.


Number1: No, I'm not sleeping with that hot bartender-- no, not that one either. You see, I have to work with these women… and (being women) they talk to each other about that kind of shit. I don't need every woman who works here to be pissed off at me for one thing or another. If I ever do decide to sleep with any of them, I probably won't be letting any of my customers know about it. This destroys the illusion that your drunken mind has created that the cute bartender wants you. That's right boys! She remembers your drink every time you come in because she wants to screw you! And because you're the only dude in here who orders Jack'n Coke! It probably doesn't have anything to do with the fact that she knows that she can get you to stay for an extra couple of drinks just by flashing her smile and making eye contact with you. Also, this increases the chances that you'll be back next week… or even on a weeknight when she's not too busy to talk. If you're a good tipper, she'll flirt more. I'll let you do the math on that one.

Yes, occasionally bartenders date customers—this tends to be the exception.


Number 2: Guys, your stupid hyper-macho frat-boy behavior does not impress anyone. Stop the yelling and hollering, the shoving, and stop spitting on my floor. It is apparent to me that you're acting this way because you want attention from some ladies—the excuse that you're just "having a little fun" doesn't gel with your earlier complaints that the scene is too much of a "sausage fest" tonight. No friend, you're not just having fun… you and the other 20 dudes in the room are vying for the attention of the 6 or 7 women in the room. If you were a peacock you'd have all of your ass-feathers in the air right now. You're trying to prove that you're the alpha-male. Isn't science fun! Here's a tip: Instead of wrestling with your friend on the beer and saliva (your fault) covered floor of my bar, learn to dance, think of something witty to say, be aloof, be witty, learn origami! Figure out something that would be amusing to someone other than you! Girls like that, I'm told. Besides, all the man on man contact (violent as it may be) really smacks of some latent homosexual tendencies. Now, I've never seen two drunk dudes screwing, but I can imagine that it looks a lot like two drunk dudes wrestling. Knock it off—you're irritating my other customers and making the bartenders nervous.


Number 3: Girls, no you don't look cute. You are 5'4" and weigh as much as me. You are wearing a halter top and miniskirt. You don't look cute. Hell, you barely look human. Consider a sweater. I'm not judging you for your body type. I'm judging you for your horrible fashion sense and your apparent tenuous grasp on reality. I'm a large, hairy guy. I never wear a Speedo to the beach, nor should you wear a band-aid and some shoestrings to my bar. That outfit would look great on Scarlet Johansen. You are not her. Those of you who really do look good in this kind of thing can continue to wear it if you like, but you can't complain about guys staring at your body. You're being an idiot. If you don't want us to look at you like a sexual object, you'll have to put away your vagina.






Number 4: Here's the situation: some insult or slight (real or imagined) has turned the whole party into a really, really serious situation. You are about to kick this mother****er's ass! You're in his face, yelling profanity and staring him down. He has friends, you have friends, etc. If I'm the bouncer, I've been assessing the situation since you walked in the door being all loud and obnoxious (see Number 2 above). While I was walking around picking up glasses, my ears were wide open. I know which group you are with and chances are if this has been building up for more than 15 minutes, I've already talked to your boys and told 'em to keep you under control. But no, now it's go time. Diplomacy has failed and you're not listening to reason. Harsh words have turned into shoving. That's my cue.

As soon as it becomes physical or overly aggressive I move in. I have been subtle about moving behind you, and you were so focused on the altercation that it comes as a complete shock when I throw an arm around your neck and take you to the ground. I won't hurt you, but if you fight me I won't let go and you'll pass out from the lack of blood to your brain. Your friends will put you in a cab and then come back to thank me for "taking care of you" and helping them get you outta there. It isn't that they don't have your back; they just didn't want you to get hurt… and you didn't. You can't come back tonight; you'll be welcome back tomorrow. Be friendly.

In the rare instance that I can't choke you out and we are actually going to be in a fight, keep the following in mind:


- You've been drinking alcohol; I've been drinking water. I have better balance and quicker reflexes than you at the moment. If we were both sober, who knows?

- My friends are here too. All of my regulars and loyalists have been itching to see me bounce someone and have all enthusiastically volunteered to help! They're drunk like you and won't be as friendly as me-- I want you to come back to my bar and spend money. They might not ever see you again, and couldn't give a shit.

- After I beat your ass and drag you outta here by one foot, I'll be the alpha-male and the 6 or 7 girls in the room will want to talk to me.


- You're going to feel like an jerk when you come back next week and apologize. Because they always do.

Number 5: You are not special. Don't stand on my furniture. You're drunk and I don't want you to fall and injure yourself. I don't want you to break my furniture, then I'd have to buy some more. No, I don't "know" you, "Buddy". No, you can't go behind the bar. No, you can't "pour your own". Yes! You can "buy a bottle" of Patron from us! That will be $70. I know it's only $25 at the liquor store, but we aren't a liquor store. One bottle of Patron holds 11 shots. You want to buy all of them. We encourage this!

Number 6: You are not necessarily a regular. If you stop in once or twice a month on a Saturday night you are a good customer, but you are not a regular. The regulars know which bartender usually works on Thursdays. The regulars know all the names of the staff and are introduced (they do not introduce themselves) to new staff members. When you stop referring to me as "Buddy" or "Pal" or "Big-Guy", you might be attaining "regular" status. The regulars don't try to get away with any of the crap mentioned in Number 5.

I hope that this text has been helpful to you. Be safe out there and look out for one another.

[Covert_Hippie]

Mega post :ohmy:

[EpicTrainwreck]

Oops... no more Redbull before I log in...

[DougP]

Come to think of it, the bar tab here is probably what I'd pay for taxes and tips back home on a good time with friends at Satchmo's (Coral Gables).

Sobe (South Beach)? Minimum $200 /300 pp but ya gotta have real action.

What happened to this guy??!! JA where are you?:scared:

[DougP]

Oops... no more Redbull before I log in...

Holy crap that what a post!:ohmy:

[Kitty Meow]

Hank you can start a wall of shame. When I had a bar in Kin we used to take pics of people that passed out or puked and post them on the wall behind the bar.

:thumbup:I second that! Great idea!

[EpicTrainwreck]

What can I say, it's an issue near and dear to my heart. Let me slowly limp back in to annonymity with my tail between my legs.

[dk]

What can I say, it's an issue near and dear to my heart. Let me slowly limp back in to annonymity with my tail between my legs.
I enjoyed your post. :thumbup1:

[GoochBomber]

Hey Hank&Rumi saw your bar on my way to Kinser yesterday...might stop in there one of these times....whenever daddy takes my curfew off and says i can drink outside that fence again....

[socalheart]

oh you can drink outside the fence in bars, just not anything alchoholic. :p hank should raise the price of his non-alchoholic drinks. heh.

[shuichi]

Don't know how any American bars will survive this....

[Fire4Effect]

Did Hank open another bar?

[Isaak Brodsky]

no, i saw 'im the other day. he's got himself a bitchin' lawncare business. kickin' some grass ass real bad.

[Kinrat]

When do you throw a drunk out? Only two times, 1 when he's out of money and 2 when it's closing time. But that's just my opinion; I've been thrown out of every bar and cat house in Kin at one time or another and mostly cause it was around 9:30 in the morning...................

[jimbob17755]

Do ya throw a guy out who goes to sleep at the bar, throws up, bothers other customers, gets in a fight? But what if this guy is one of your top spenders, let's say 10% of sales. A larger club with lots of customers, i would say yeah, toss him. But a smaller joint? What do ya think.
Make him a partner!

[Maggie]

Throw him out maybe he will figure it out.

I have been thrown out plenty of times.:ohmy:

Usually for making a pass at guy who looks like a girl. :cool:


You're among many others :ohmy:

Maggie